I found this on Mormonshare and thought I'd share. I hope it doesn't offend anyone. I couldn't figure most of them out, since I'm not a texter.
If God had texted the 10 Commandments to Moses, here's what He might have sent:
M, pls rite on tabs & giv 2 ppl:
- no1 b4 me. srsly.
- dnt wrshp pix/idols
- no omg's
- no wrk on wkend (sat 4 now; sun l8r)
- pos ok - ur m&d r cool
- dnt kill ppl
- ;-X only w/m8
- dnt steal
- dnt lie re:bf
- dnt ogle ur bf's m8. or ox. or dnkey. myob.
For those of you not familiar with texting shortcuts, here's the translation:
Moses, please write this on tablets and give it to the people:
- No one before me. Seriously.
- Don't worship pictures or idols
- No Oh My G*D's (taking Lord's name in vain)
- No working on the weekend -- Saturday for now, Sunday later. (Keep Sabbath day holy -- Sabbath is Saturday for now, Sunday later.)
- Parents Over Shoulder okay. Your Mom and Dad are cool. (Honor thy father and thy mother)
- Don't kill people.
- Sex only with spouse.
- Don't steal.
- Don't lie regarding best friend. (don't bear false witness against neighbor)
- Don't ogle your best friend's spouse or posessions. Mind Your Own Business. (Don't covet)